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| So This Would Officially Be The Last Post.
Its been hell of a 2 weeks.
So much has happened, So much thinking , So much choices, So much is beeing learned.
Its not just beeing in isolated in prison that got me thinking.
Its things that happens around which remains untold, unknown.
Its more beyond the surface sometimes.
way beyond the surface.
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But i've learned alot. .
1. I've learned to fit in/comform to ways of society.
2. I've learned its time to literally grow up.
3. I've learned to blame no one.
4. I've learned to put others ahead.
5. I've learned to only show what the world wants to see, and keep the rest in.
6. I've learned that having much feelings and emotions is a weakness
7. I've learned to become strong.
8. I've learned not to bother what people think.
9. I've learned to suppress the anger
10. I've learned to sacrifice
10. And most of all I've learned to Forgive.
Goodbye For Now.
Last piece
Jeff.
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| Thanks alot.
I was trying to save myself.
I was trying to pleased you guys
I was trying to do what i`m supposed to do here.
and Most of all I`m trying to Live again.
I was trying my best . Trying to achieve.to survive
I had my reasons to do what i did.
All of you never ever consider that did you?
I wasn't beeing immature,i wasn't beeing silly.
I HAD TO. If only you knew what was the real story. What was really happening. What i'm being put through
Sometimes i guess i should have reassured you that i really know what i'm doing
I know what i'm here for.
And you shouldn't force your own ways in. thinking you know whats best.
If only you'd understand, the ways i choose to fix things and make things better.
Clearly. You guys dont know me at all.
But i'm not blaming anyone now.
I just wished if you knew i was trying my best to crawl up.
its to late now.
It was just like i was pushed to the edge and while my hands are trying to hold on. You came and step on both hands causing it to slip away.
I just wanted you to know, I tried . I FUCKING TRIED
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| Seriously What Do You Want From Me?
Like You haven't done enough to make it worst.
Everytime, i'm getting better
You come back in and bring me down again
And i thought family was one of the only thing i could count on
clearly. I was wrong.
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We all face adversity in our life. However, it's not the adversity, but how we react to it that will determine the joy and happiness in our lives. During tough times, do we spend too much time feeling sorry for ourselves, or can we, with gratitude...learn how to dance in the rain?
When we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that's present... We experience heaven on earth.
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Its true , how we need to enjoy going through hardtimes, we're bound to g through it again and again through out our lives. Instead. of locking yourself at home, drugging yourself, smashing stuff. etc.etc. why not look at it, at a different perspective.
Ps: so i just read some other blogs which sounded really depressed, and i thought this might help
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| What happen to the days where human use to walk around naked and we all accepted each other?
It was last sunday, and the lady next to me, was telling that to her few months old baby. That really got me thinking.
What happened?
Its ironic how we use to be naked, our mind and everything were stripped naked too, there wasn't anything to hide, no dirty lil secrets. everything was out, revealed. bad thought good thought, and people just accepted each other despite that, physically and mentally. knowing that everyone have flaws , n no one is perfect, but now, we're dressed up, covered up, our minds,are all cover up 2, hiding all the jealously, envy , sins and everything. nothing is opened up anymore, and it just keeps manifesting within.Nothing could be let out, or they would be judge.
Its ironic how , the world tells us to " Be Yourself", and the sad reality is you can never be yourself.
We are all livng the way society wants and tell us how to live, in a way to another. Like a robot, like a army.
Since we're borned we;ve been implanted with lies and misconception about life, about almost everything. We're just a robot to the society, living the way they want us to live, thinking they way they want us to think
there are some who aren't decieve by society, Living its true creed , and purpose. A life different from others, a life of itself, individual, beeing who he is, embracing the true self.
However People " beeing themselves" would be placed into the insane, mentally ill section of todays society, as they;re living a life, different to the majority. The majority who follows and obey the way the society wants them to behave. Definition of mental disorder : disability that is not expected as part of normal development or culture.
People who be themselves and doesn't comform society ways . are seen as mentally ill people now.
Majority of the society today is feeling insecure, when someone else is seen to be different, they would put them in the asylum, or elsewhere, somewhere unseen, so they could be forgotten, That way society would never be reminded the fact that there's a different way to life out there.
Insecure Society doesn't want to know or be REMINDED that there's a different way of life out there.
Why ? why cant we all live in peace, and accept the difference of one another, Truth is we;re all different, we're unique in our own ways. drop the race, drop the culture, drop the religions, We're all the same, why are we fighting against ourselves? why are we disowning our own people? Why are we not embracing and accepting each other? 
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It Always Rain the Hardest On people Who Deserve the SUN
-j3ff-
dobisgirls_lays
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